Ranger Danger: Parts of Day 10-12

Well, I start to write this chapter yet again, this being the 5^th time. The last four times I tried, I was sitting in Zion at our camp site and my computer was effected by some type of strange phenomenon where Zion didn’t want me to tell my side of the story. What story you ask?

It all started out with a crew of eight trying to have fun and camp. We got back from Angels Landing and I decided to sit out on a trip to town. As the gang left, I sat down at a picnic table where I tried writing something similar to this but not as much in detail. Now I sit in a chair listening to my dirty clothes spin around becoming cleaner and cleaner with each letter I type, and I think to myself, “How could I spare any juicy little detail on the events that folded on the afternoon of day 10 or even that very night?”, and I can’t. So while typing up wonderful food for your mind to devour, a ranger pulls his SUV up and I approach him, being the good law abiding citizen that I am, to see what we possibly could have done. We may have been a little, “loud”, during quiet hours the previous night, but I feel that would have been addressed during those times.

He ordered me to sit down at a different table. I asked politely if I could sit at my computer and he responded with a hard felt no and pointed to the table again. I waited a few minutes as he had to do something in his truck with his radio of some sorts. He came over and removed an axe from the table and asked me if I had any weapons on me which I did not. He ask me for my I.D. and where everyone else was. I responded that they were in town and that they will be back in 15 minutes or so. I told him I don’t have my I.D. and that it was in the Van. I gave him all my information including my driver’s license number to cooperate with him. So he goes and checks out my information and comes back and asks in a very serious tone, as if I gave him wrong information, everything again and recites it all, kind of questioning me. So then he found out that he wrote my number down wrong and checks with dispatch about me. He comes back and I have no warrants out for my arrest or anything. So that was a relief.

Finally I ask him if I did something wrong or if I could help him with something to which he responded with, yeah, you’re in trouble. I kept thinking to myself, “What the hell did I do?” He asked us how we got in for free, and honestly I had no idea at the time due to the fact I was sleeping on the way here, and that’s what I told him. He thought I was lying and I could see it in his face. He asked if we paid for the other site next door. I told him no and that we were under the impression that we could fit into one campsite. I found a note on our table that we had to use the other site as well and pay for it. So I explain that part to him. Then this ranger looks around and says that were breaking multiple violations in a campsite and that we need to fix it immediately. One thing he “knocked” us on, was food out in the open but we were about to cook and eat, we just need firewood, that happened to be in town. Before he left, he said, “You guys come from Yellowstone and treat campsites like this?” After that comment, I really didn’t care for this guy and I knew I would regret not continuing to cooperate with him, but I responded with, I didn’t camp at all this season in Yellowstone…He didn’t look happy with that response. He too his hands, placed them on the sides of his neck, grabbed his bulletproof vest, it seemed like he needed some air, or it was a threat…but he said, “You guys have 30 minutes to get your shit together and I will be back in 30 minutes. So he left.

The Gus bus pulls up five minutes later and I tried to tell the gang on how big of a pushover this ranger is and that he’ll be back. So we pay for the site and get our campsite up to regulation. It’s now 7:00 and no sign of the ranger. 7:30, still no sign. By this time we have had some drinks in us and we thought they weren’t coming by. 8:00 he shows up with another ranger. Once again they started to treat us like felons. They asked for weapons and I.D.’s without telling us of anything we did wrong. 

The long story short of this encounter, they thought we put a blank envelope with no money into the deposit box so that we would camp for free. Brad and I dropped the money into the box; I saw it with my own eye. The main guy pulled Brad over to question him about the whole thing. Meanwhile, good cop looked over us. We couldn’t pull out a cigarette or touch the fire that was keeping us warm. They were way to extreme about the whole thing in my opinion and mostly everyone else agreed. 10 Minutes went by and I told the good cop, I’m moving this log onto the other one, do what you have to, but I’m freezing and we need to be warm. I didn’t wait for his response and just did it. Nothing happened. The bad cop pulled the good cop over to, what seemed like, double up on Brad. Brad assured them that he put the money in the box. Before they left, they said something along the lines of, you better not be lying, tell us the truth, because if you’re lying, we’ll be back and they pulled away. As soon as they pulled away, I told everyone, “I told you so. I tried to tell you he was a dick but I did tell you.” At that point, Sam was still getting over a cold he got from a wedding three days before that, so he went to bed. As far as myself, and the others, we stayed up and had a good time.

Maybe I didn’t. There was a point where I was tired and drank a little too much, some might say. 

Never the less, the rangers came back and it all started again. I guess you could say that I have a slight problem with authority that doesn’t treat with respect or something along those lines. So I was a little to perhaps a lot under the influence and not happy with the rangers. It was ten minutes after quiet hours and we were not being what most would call “quiet”. I kept asking the bad cop what his name was. During this point in time, Brad kept offering money to “shut up” and I just wouldn’t let it go. So finally the ranger responded with, my name and badge number will be on your ticket. I will say this as I write it, I don’t recall much of this. I do recall fake crying, to which some say I may have gotten an Oscar if it was recorded, and complaining about a $75 noise violation. Then when I did get my ticket, the ranger had such horrible penmanship, that I’m sure he was a doctor in his past life, because I couldn’t read any of it.

The next day I was handed the ticket by Brad and was told stories on how my acting career wasn’t what I thought it was. Some of the crew says that the ranger looked a little sad for me but got over it when I couldn’t stand up. Needless to say, my drinking is monitored not only by myself but my friends as well. Everyone said they would chip in on the ticket too. Apparently everyone was going to get a ticket but since I was the loudest, they targeted me. Serves me right.

Icing on the cake…      

      

Two nights later, the good cop came back and asked how we were doing. Immediately, I apologized for my behavior and he said don’t worry about it, it happens. To my favor, he made a mistake on the ticket. He wrote down the wrong violation. He said there were two things he could do. One, he could reissue a ticket with correct information, or just void the whole thing out and go our separate ways. I ran to grab the ticket and that was that. I fought the law and the law screwed up.